slightly left of center thoughts

I have not messed up the art of writing for quite some time and I thought that it’s about time to update my outdated blog post. I had several projects for the past days though, even during my birthday. Yes, July 7 and I have to face toil in order to submit three projects, which were all due that day. I cannot understand this phenomenon, every time it’s my birthday, I usually feel depressed. Hmm…maybe because I am expecting to feel special, I am waiting to see a new person in me or perhaps a beautiful presage for my days to come, but still the day remains ordinary. For the rest of the world, July 7 is just an ordinary day: go to work, go back home, buy some stuff, then watch soap opera at night. Unfortunate for me, the birthday girl, my day also had the same twist.

My parents did their best to commemorate that day. My mom told me how she braved the night and the wet, asphalted road aboard a provincial ambulance, only to go to a better hospital where she can deliver me…My mom is really a strong person. My dad cooked the 1-Kilo spaghetti they have been hoarding in the cupboard for special occasions. He cooked that much even if I told him that my friends are not coming over, so we spent several days snacking on reheated pasta. He also bought me cake, with icing greetings on top. Sigh, so typically sweet for a parent =) As for me, I was nonchalant, trying to shrug everything off, just trying to focus on the work that I have to do while replying to all the gazillion text greetings that I received. It’s a good thing that I bought load, and even better that I used that load off trying to thank everyone who remembered.

So to make my story quite worthwhile to read, I asked my friends to go out last Sunday night, 2 days after my birthday. I realized that it really feels great to be with those persons who feel almost like a second skin to you. Those who will salvage you from your own bad jokes and those who are not shy to order quite as much =)…Food, drinks, many laughs and stories, those guys really made me happy. And when I went home, I was still beaming despite my mom’ s interrogations.

Recently, while on a tricycle ride, my friend Joann was telling me that she stopped counting her age. I told her that it’s because we no longer feel our age. It’s as if we are forever stuck at 20, or was it 21? Nevertheless, the world goes on spinning, but it seems that my inner self remains the same. Probably this is not true because we continuously pick-up things from our environment, and learning is a constant event even if we don’t realize it. Yet still, I can’t believe that I am 24. Most of the times, I have to remind myself of my age.

So as for now, I am back here in my private nook. In fact, I feel almost confined to this small alcove of mine where I conceptualize many of my ideas. In retrospect, I used to have (and perhaps I still do) the fantasies of exploring the world. I used to think that when I work, I will travel to see, taste, sniff, and feel everything. Right now, I’m pretty much trapped, but soon I’ll come to that. I hope that for the coming 348 days before I turn 25, I will reach new places, (see new kinds of bustle, hear new kind of noise/music, taste unfamiliar foods, etc…) and most of all broaden my horizon…Sigh, 348 days, I guess, is rather long for dreaming…

~ by frozenmocha on July 12, 2006.